talk

there you are.
sitting there
not waiting for me to talk.
i'm waiting for you to talk
and i fight my hand
that wants to click your name
and start the conversation
i know i'll love and hate
because i know
that you don't love it like i do.
i fight the urge to tell you
how it is for me
because you won't understand
or you won't care.

angel kisses

some things i will never forget.

invisible

will someone please see me?
won't anyone care?
look at me, into me
not through and past me.
i am real.
maybe you have never seen
one like me,
one who dies
with every breath
and who lives with abandon.
i want someone to hold me
and to know me.
and to care.

other me

this is oppressive.
how long can it last?
i think i'm dying.
i think i'm crazy.
i'm talking to myself again.
and to you.
you aren't even here
and you're talking to me
in my head,
in my dreams,
talking to the other me.
i hate her;
she tries to take me
and she tells my friends she is me.
and she talks to you
and tells you
nothing that i wish i could say.
i want to get rid of her
but she is the only one here with me.